Tonight's return was rejuvenating: the usual tiredness and hunger faded before the warmups were even over. A blister I've had for a while finally burst today, so there was some raw skin on my left hand, but luckily just below where I grip the base of the shinai, so it didn't really hurt me and my technique. Sensei led today, which meant plenty of kihon but also nuki-waza. Apparently "nuki" means "you-thought-it-was-there-but-wait-it-isn't." This included one of my favorites, kote-nuki-men, but also new stuff like do-nuki-men. It's my sort of practice including the dreaded okuri-ashi backwards but then strike men (or men-men, or men-men-men) forward on the blocks with no delay ashi-sabaki prctice, plus no-nonsense kirikaeshi and then kakarigeiko.

The most regular sensei counsels that I should avoid using all of those new fancy small-waza, instead favoring the big kihon that better befits my ikkyu status. Sensei meanwhile compares kendo to a buttress which is, um, buttressing a wall. It must support the wall, providing constant pressure. I tend instead to slip off my target, the point sliding off the opponent rather than making a bee-line laser-sight type pushy intensity. I feel happier against tall opponents, that I'm trying for debana men or men rather than the easy way out which is kote. The problem is that I need to counter kote better: and there are so many ways--nuki-men, suriage-men, kaeshi-men, ai-kote-men. Unfortunately I'm only good at nuki-men, and even then sporadically. I just need to keep pushing forward and do more suburi & squats.

I skipped two practice this weekend, but I suspect that at least one of them would have been a little odd because of the shimpan seminar, which might have been somewhat interesting, though. I have been trying to do suburi and hindu squats. The latter are charmingly fun, though I can only do 30s with comfort. That I got a callus from my Saturday set was probably due to my doubling my set-sizes (to get through them faster), and bad tenouchi, plus an unfriendly bokuto.

Champion Sensei and son's visit today somehow made things more crowded today, although there was no advance notice. This somewhat killed my buzz, as my first few matches were in danger of bumping into the ever-growing crowd of beginners. I felt overall that today wasn't that great of a practice, with lots of different basics I need to still work on. To name a few: keeping center, smaller waza, less right-hand, following through, continuing to mean it, and other types of zanshin in general. So not the most satisfying practice, but there's always next week.

Cross-training:

I am trying to devise a program. I suppose suburi don't count, but whereas before I tried to do sets of as many as possible, recent advice (from certain taikai-champs and hachidan-sensei) has convinced me that less is more--so I try to do shorter sets with better shisei and tenouchi. In particular, I think that it's a problem that most of the time I don't have easy access to a mirror. It helps immeasurably, while the new focus on having my arms more perpendicular than v-shaped and down is also a different sort of goal with my suburi. But the suburi resolution is just 500, but daily, not just off days. All shomen, sets of 100. A shame I can't practice hayasuburi.

Hindu squats! I'm going to try and do this on off days.

It's just not clear, even with the better weather, how I can work in better cardio. And there's not as good a way to do kakari-geiko type training. I suppose there's always interval training, though I've never been so big on that.

I'm still vain enough to note that although my pecs and so on have shrunken, my forearms are getting more and more defined. Still not Popeye, though.

So thanks to a teacher meeting, I was late to practice, which meant I dressed in five minutes, ran upstairs, did kirikaeshi with three non-bogus, and then had one longish keiko with a Chinese shodan. Mostly I tried debana men that came too late, but a couple of times I went tsuki-tsuki-tsuki-sashi-men (well, no actual tsuki, but the feeling), so I was happy with that. But it really wasn't enough to scratch my kendo itch, so to speak. I will try and do a lot more suburi on my off days, or something, as I could probably do well to drop a few pounds.

Afterwards, I did some dummy-men, both suriashi and fumikomi style, with no follow-through, which is a drill favored by some sensei. I found it enjoyable enough, but of course I don't have a real dummy at home.

Shiai:

In individuals, I'm paired first against another mudansha who plays a little close for my tastes. I manage to score a men off of him. But then I tend to play too close, hoping to burn time rather than continuing to be aggressive without opening myself to his attacks. He scores a kote, somehow. Then, with time trickling away, he manages to pull off a hiki-do, which is rather impressive in that division. So I lose, but could have easily won if I had continued to pressure him, rather than sticking in tsuba-zeriai. I need to remember than in sanbon-shobu, ippon is not enough.

In team matches, I am sempo on the A-team. In our first match, against a Midwest College team, again I'm drawn in too close, in tsubazeriai rather than at good old issoku-itto. This means that it is difficult to score, and so while I do manage to push him out of bounds for hansoku at one point, eventually he lands some sort of men at the edge of the shiai-jo. Although this is scored by the people at the desk as a men for our side, which is odd to say the least. Luckily, we win two and draw two and win the match.

Our second match is against a college team from Canada. As with most college teams, they don't have much in terms of rank or experience. I land a men, and we sweep the rest of the matches. My opponent is quite aggressive but lifts too high. He also does not have much follow through. I reduce my kiai and landed my strike with decent timing, though I don't remember much else.

Our last match-up is against another Midwest college team, but one of the professorial rather than student bent. This means that they outrank us. My sempo match is against a sandan, and I am tempted to try and draw him, and indeed that would have given us victory. Instead I do my best, and we exchange a few ai-men. At one point I go out of bounds, but we have both completed a strike and are trying to out-kiai each other. It's only a matter of time before he lands a big kihon-men. Our second match we also lose as our shiaiest player wrestles around with this opponent, but his opponent hits a solid kote. So we're down 2-0. Luckily, our chuken and our fukusho both win their matches. So it's tied 2-2 and down to taisho. In this match, our sensei is up against a jodan-sensei, and time runs out with neither side able to score, though sensei down on hansoku, as our opponent is rather pushy. So it goes to tie-breaker. Our shiai player goes up. He tries to tsuki the taisho in jodan, but is drawn in too deep. A big katate-men comes down and it's all over for us.

So, it's a performance not unlike last year's for me, at least--scored two ippon, but lost all my matches but one. I need to learn when to shoot for hikiwake, and when to go all out.

I really lost my temper today in practice, when my aforementioned sempai-turned-kohai continued to be frustarting to practie against. I'd given up on shikake-waza, as he just blocks it, making it difficult for me to do anything at all (not even an upward, tsuba-ward block, but rather a horizontal blcok), except receive half-kikentai attacks, mostly with the kiai coming after. But the point is at one point when he thrust the butt of his tsuka at me, I kind of lost it, launching into about a minute worth of loud kakarigeiko. But I regret it, as it's not as if I scoerd a single point for all those attacks, and if I can pour it on then, then why not all of the time?

No, the tonight was just an off practice, though the kihon and wza portions were strong. I guess I just wasn't pushing myself as forward as I should have, though at the same time I guess against Sensei proper I got in a fe decen thits, but felt a little off-balance, always somehow hopping more than should have, with my left-foot sometimes crossing over. It's hard to describe, but it wasn't satisfying, and I need to continue to work on tenouchi rather than hacking and using too much power. I'm happy to report that my musculature has shifted from my pecs to the my lats and my forearms, though of course at that I'm also still a novice.

Being sempai is actually rather tiring, though I think I did a decent job, except for a few missed beats and hajimes. But I felt out of breath for some time afterwards, even though my hayasuburi is still shit and needs a lot more work. The rest of practice was pretty standard for a Tuesday--good intensity, with a solid focus on kihon rather than tricky-waza. In particular I enjoy doing debana-men more than degote, though I think that I need to practice my degote more, as that's possible more useful in shiai situations, and I have continued to favor men in practice. My do strike feels better though still not natural--certainly worth a try here and there, at least.

In jigeiko I was happy to land a solid kote-nuki-men against the teaching sensei tonight, while feeling good about how I was handling my taller opponents. We were asked to focus today on striking with arms extended straight and perpendicular to the torso, rather than down and v-shaped. This allows for the monouchi to hit the men-buton, which is the actual target, not the mengane. With the greater range, one can also follow through and run through and over the opponent. Snappy tenouchi is certainly something I need to work on. It felt good also, though one of the Taiwanese sensei cautioned me that I tend to move my body to the right all the time as I seme, so I should instead switch it up, sometimes moving to the left--what's called 'back seme' as that is more likely to create an opening. There still one sempai-turned-kohai who tends to block my attacks, so I try to wait for him to attack, but in those cases I tend to be a little slow. So it's frustrating to practice with him, as he also has very little kikentai. I need to figure out some better way to practice with him. Against my kohai, though, I still tend to either wait too much (but still connect) or not give them enough of a chance to clear their good connects, as there are many ways to counteract a slightly large men strike.

In good news, the new MINO shinai which I bought from e-bogu.com which shattered in an odd way (under the surface, in a lateral way) on the front stave after three practices, will be replaced by the company, as the stave was defective. So now I will have 7 bio-staves. Hopefully these will last.

One more practice until shiai. How should I practice in the downtime?

The snow meant that few enough people showed today that I ended up having to sweep, but this meant that Sensei was able to give us more detailed instruction on shiai-useful waza, mostly taiatari, and tsuki, which somehow fails to help me so much, one because I'm in mudansha, and two because I absolutely suck at it. I need to keep my arms tucked in and not wobble around my left hand quite as much. I am still trying to figure out why my left shin sometimes hurts, but I suppose that having injured feet doesn't help.

Still, again I would have preferred jigeiko to shiaigeiko. Against a nyubian kohai, I managed two straight men rather rapidly--in the first case after chasing him--he's slow to turn around, and then by winning an ai-men with tenouchi, for once. Against my immediate sempai, i lost out of a soft-men, but then with my bioshinai kept on twisting it, so sensei stopped the match, long-enough for me to recompose myself and nail his men from kamae, so we ended up in hikiwake.

The fun part of practice was the circular-ippon-challenge. One person in the middle, fights all comers to ippon, who can come from any side, though in this case we went around. I lasted two rounds at the most, the second match rather hard fought before managing a well-tired men against someone much taller than me.

Tonight was another solid keiko (although I was embarassed to have run into my students on the way), in which I scored two straight men in shiaigeiko again, although against a kohai, which was slightly less exhiliarating than against a sempai. I really need to not psych myself out before the tournament though, as I was relatively confident last November and then lost both my matches rather quickly. I need to modulate better, and to be confident--willing to wait for ippon rather than attacking kakarigeiko style, but this can be hard against new opponents against whom I dont' really know. Then again, I've only had three shiai and probably fewer than 10 shiai matches ever, so what can I say? I ought to be just focus on kihon, kihon, kihon, not breaking shinai, and mostly on right-shoulder tension and tenouchi, as I think that that is what is holding me back the most.

Bonusgeiko tonight saw me finally defeat one of my shodan sempai with two straight men. (Which is a little ironic, of course...) It was a good feeling, and the best part was how the first men was from kamae and was some sort of debana-waza and relatively large rather than some sashi-nonsense--it felt like actual seme. Or something. The thwock was most satisfying. My immediate, sempai, however, took my men in 1pon. I think that this is in part because I wasn't pushing myself quite as much as I should have, having grown complacent in the time since.

I find, however, that I have come to like a certain type of practice. Tonight was mostly waza of various sorts, including some anti-jodan waza as well as hikiwaza, taiatari, shinai-seme, dragonflies, and so on. There was also a lot of talk, as of coruse Sensei differ greatly in terms of how much they are willing and able to be explicit about. But I think that the type of practice I favor more is the type which is just very fast, continuous, and from the uchikomi or kakarigeiko point of view: it's all about endurance, speed, and pushing the envelope. I think I enjoy kihon more than waza.

Still, my kote-men sucks. I need to do it better.

And I can't afford to break any more shinai--it's been ridiculous, and my new BIO has already lost a splinter.

I've noticed that I've fallen into the "So..." habit here. This I will remedy forthwith. But seriously--today was perhaps standard in terms of energy--I go in tired--trying to nap on the subway, and tired behind the eyes. And having overhydrated, I needed to pee, but of course, after getting well into practice both the tiredness and the urge to urinate evaporated, and indeed I felt as if tonight I didn't really push myself far enough to really feel tired at the end. Then again, shiaigeiko tends to do that, and even kakarigeiko today was not strenuous in the right way.

Tsuki and do--I'm still mudansha, but it's time to start thinking about these. I've resolved to try and pull at least one do in each keiko. I am continuing to have the same problem with kohai--I'm not aggressive enough and wait too often. In particular, against one other male kohai I simply can't seem to score--maybe he lifts up too much, or maybe his timing is good, but I can't dominate adequately. I tend to do better against people who are higher ranked, as in that case it's easier for me to throw myself fully into the mathc, with nothing to lose.

In shiai I did well against someone much higher ranked of the dodgy, snappy Korean style. He tends to be very fast but have limited kiai and zanshin. I held him to hikiwake, with strong kiai, but limited waza. I should have used more taiatari. And kote.

Afterwards, the Korean duo advise that I am still far too tense, that I turn my right hand in too much, which further tenses my shoulder and makes my kote ultimately wide open. My persistent attacking, however, makes it difficult to score on me, but it's just a matter of timing and tempo for a more talented opponent.

Now I just need to learn how to breathe in mokuso.

Note to self: wear kote in keiko! I've been breaking too many shinai of late, and usually on the right stave, which means that I am using too much right hand, I think, and not hitting the men buton properly. Something to keep in mind, as I'm sure all those senseis are tired of correcting my tense right shoulder by now. So it was a disconnected practice from the first bad kihon men and I just felt off, though I suppose I got some decent reviews from the regular Sensei, though he advises that I need a good deal more sashi-men in my repertoire, as my men is still relatively slow compared to his. My ura-harai-waza is also deeply ineffective these days, as I think it's too slow by a beat and is probably too big. I am striving, though, to throw in at least one do into each keiko, and also a few straight kote, though of course the focus is still on men-men-men-men-men. Meanwhile, the top female yudansha comments that I've improved, only insofar as it is now much more difficult to hit my men (though my kote is still wide open), as I have debana waza and aiuchi ready. I still need to find and work on a tokui-waza for shiai, though. I think that a ura-harai-kote might be it, as I have an unconventional kote that goes under the opponent's shinai rather than over. I don't know if that's good, but it works, just like slightly moving your left fist to the right, and then striking.

So Sundays tend to generally be more intense and all, but today it was odd as no Sensei showed until nearly half an hour into regular practice, so while everything was accelerated and we went through yet more much-needed training in taiatari-men, as my hikiwaza still suck. But somehow, during jigeiko, my attention wandered and I again started to be half-seriously playing, not keeping the intensity between strikes, rather than keeping my focus throughout, in a life-or-death attitude. So it was just strike-men, try for ai-men, reset, strike again for a while, which wasn't the best way fo doing things. I did, however, land a passable give-it-all-away do, faking out my opponent completely, and with decent zanshin. That's still not one of my standard waza, though, and I feel that do is still a little exotic for someone my rank and experience--I should probably think more about refining my kote-men, which has gotten very very sloppy of late--I guess that is in part because in the past I would habitually hit kote-men rather than men straightaway in order to try and create an opening and close the distance. These days with my efforts to hit men all by itself, and of the debana or uchiotoshi varieties, I tend to eschew kote, perhaps too much.

But I should remind myself that I'm much better off focusing on kihon, kihon, kihon, rather than anything fancy-shmancy at this point. Still, an occasional men-misete-kote can't hurt.

So it's a great contrast, the transition from kata (kodachi ipponme through sanbonme) to kendo-keiko, though Saturdays usually means more focus on jigeiko, with very little kihon-geiko, and today we also squeezed in some shiai-geiko. Today actually I managed to practice against three Sensei, including one who hasn't been around quite so much the past few months, so it was a good revisiting on my progress since then since he would yell at me in the past for various minor offenses, such as mokuso-ing wrong, breaking mawari, loosing energy. So it was good energy all throughout, with brief keikos, which I think I prefer, as I get to burst forward more.

My shiai bout was against my immediate sempai, who is also my immediate sempai overall in terms of the dojo, as he has an extra month on me, but practices far far more than I do. I started out really strong with massive kiai, and scored an ipponme men after we followed through on an attack--I nailed it with a satisfying thwack. Unfortunately, my kensen came off, and so I had to get a replacement shinai, and this meant that I broke the rhythm and after I ran all the way downstairs redfaced in full bogu, and then rushed back, never regaining the momentum, and losing with two straight men. I think another problem is that I used up most of my kiai too early on, and then was panting too much, and it was only a three minute match. I should try to play strategically--this is sanbonshobu, which means that after I have ippon I should play differently, though I suppose in real life my matches don't go well after I have ippon--at June's shiai, I scored a kote out of the gate, but then went down to two men's. So it's delicate balance--not to loosen up enough to let the opponent score, but also to not overexert and lose all my energy too quickly.

So bonusgeiko is inherently great, but it's even better when I manage to squeeze in a nap before practice. I felt extra-crispy today as we were put through the condensed but concentrated rounds: mawari-ippon-shobu, kakari-geiko, men-taiatari-renzoku-men, and then shiai-geiko. Completely exhausting and yet at the same time invigorating. No real waza, and I still need to find a tokui-waza, though I feel as if my kote has improved greatly and isn't something to sneeze at, but I don't think it's my clutch waza. It was nice to play so much jigeiko, although I guess I do miss the kihon. I have been striving to use more men and avoid kote even in jigeiko, but I shouldn't neglect kote quite so much, while men-misete-kote might be something to play with as well. I'm told that my debana-men is of a good speed, but I need to make it much smaller and sharper, with my hands higher in zanshin--not bouncing up and showing how uncomitted my strike is, but rather going well over my opponent. Following through, following through--this is definitely something I need to work on, as I stop after even a good point.

So today Sensei took matters into his own hands, and actually taught us some specific waza, which is somewhat out of character, as usually he focuses on endurance and feeling and kihon, rather than the tricky left-hand-fowrard, but right-hand stays in place men and kote sashi-waza, plus gyaku-do, which seems like an odd thing to teach beginners, and I never quite got the feeling for it. Madame Sensei also returned, though she seemed a little out of sorts, not really joining us too much in practice and then in jigeiko I felt pretty good and in control with most of my opponents, even Sensei himself, off of whom I probably scored the most points today than ever. I should really do my best to keep up my kiai, as it really is an intimidating thing sometimes. I guess as much as I appreciate learning new waza, I would much rather just do more and more jigeiko and this point, though I haven't been neglecting suburi, shooting for at least 300 every off day from practice.